Learn the Secret for what to do with Giant Zucchini

It happens to the best of us. Even with diligent checking and making it easy to harvest, it is easy to overlook a zucchini. They grow insanely fast, seemingly doubling overnight. They blend in with the rest of the plant. Giant leaves cover and protect like a hired bodygard, keeping the fruit out of site for us mere mortals who lack zucchini X-ray sight super powers.

These are just some of the reasons why every summer, we all end up with a giant squash that weighs several pounds and can rival a small baby. Its also why every summer I see several posts on facebook and get the occasional desperate text, pleading for ideas and advise: HOW DO YOU USE THESE GIANT ZUCCHINIS!!!!

I’m going to let you in on a top secret way on what to do with giant zucchini.

Ready?

You don’t.

Now stay with me. No one actually wants to eat that giant zucchini. When they get so large, they are tough. They are seedy. They are watery. All around, they are gross.

Call me a zucchini snob, but I don’t bother with any squash that gets larger than the circumference of my wrist. Ones that are an inch or two get sautéed. Ones slightly larger get grated. Any larger, and they never make it into the kitchen.

Its not like these things are saffron or truffles: rare and practically invaluble. Everyone has a crap ton (yes, a valid measurement) of these things, at a delicious harvestable size. They are selling for super cheap at the farmers market. Your neighbor probably has plenty to give away. YOU likely even have an abundance of them.

Yes, yes, I know- you don’t want to waste food. Especially those of use who strive for self-sufficiency, its been pounded into our brains that we must use up all of the harvest, preserve and waste not. But there is no reason to force yourself into some creative meal in order to take advantage of this miserable veggie. You wouldn’t eat a tomato that was past its prime and gone moldy, would you? These giant squash are exactly that- they are past their prime. Save the zucchini meals for ones that actually taste good.

Go give those giant ones to the chickens or throw in your compost. I give you permission.

You’re welcome.

Still not convinced? Bon Appetit has some ideas if you’re still on a mission to put that thing to use: http://www.bonappetit.com/test-kitchen/cooking-tips/article/cook-massive-zucchini

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